Monday 7 November 2011

Of 'G' spots, Wicker Men and Sarkozy


Amateurs do it better

I was invited last week to a production of a new musical based on the cult British film "The Wicker Man" written, directed and starring Keynsham resident Kenneth Pollock (in costume above). I must confess that I had never seen the original, but Kenneth has done a superb job of dramatising this timely theatrical treat. The story takes place on a small island, much like our own, which has its own ways, customs and idiosyncrasies. The people live an idyllic life, bringing in the harvest, dancing around Maypoles, maintaining a healthy tradition of ritual human sacrifice and working hard to ensure the success of the island's economy. Inevitably 'bureaucrats' across the sea become increasingly suspicious of this happy go lucky, living, breathing example of the 'Big Society' in action and dispatch a tiresome apparatnik to impose 'order' where they perceive there to be none. Happily, the locals are having none of it and through a process of 'collective decision making' (you might be more familiar with the term 'referendum') decide that the best course of action is to burn this oaf in an enormous 'wicker man' (hence one assumes the title of the piece) while singing delighful sentiments in Middle English. The musical was characterised by sparky performances from the Keynsham Amateur Dramatics society and special mention must go to Mrs Edith Orton, whose lively depiction of a 'sex obsessed  nymph' (clearly meant to be some years younger than the good lady herself) must surely have set many elderly hearts racing. One found oneself whistling the show-stopping "Burn the Pig Alive" for many days after. Frankly, with talent like this, who needs the West End?

The Rights of Succession, G20 and the Commonwealth

I was delighted to read last week that the Commonwealth Heads of State meeting in Perth, decided unanimously to overturn the frankly outdated 1707 Rights of Succession Act, finally allowing female offspring of the monarch the same rights of succession as their male counterparts. The act shall also of course afford the future King or Queen the option of marrying a Catholic if they so desire. Henceforth no-one shall be able to accuse the House of Windsor of being anything but a very modern hereditary monarchy (in the line of descendants of Henry VIII in accordance with the third succession Act of 1543).

By sharp contrast one was thoroughly under-whelmed by the 'G20' meeting in Cannes(not 'despots' but 'G spots') Like some mid nineties boy-band I would challenge you to name any but the star players of this expensive and short-lived bun fight. The sight of Mr Sarkozy strutting about, put one in mind of a decidedly 'New Money' acquaintance, who held her late eighties 'coming out party' in the grounds of a 'rented' castle.

Happily, her father was to later lose the lot in some ill thought out 'dot com' investments. A fate which brought a wry smile to the lips of many of those who had been unfortunate enough to suffer the aforementioned party and the intolerable non-vintage 'Lanson' that was served.Whilst wishing no ill on the diminutive Mr Sarkozy, one shall be watching the passage of his 'austerity' package with interest.

That is all for now. My lunch of quince and cheese is calling. I bid you all a hearty Ave and look forward to enlightening you further soon.

JRM

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